(no subject)

I don't know how I got here.

I don't know how I got here, and what's worse I don't know how I'm going to get home, and what's even worse than that is knowing that even if I do get home, no one is going to believe me. God help me, they'll think I'm talking about writing an au, or worse, au with a Mary Sue in. Then I'd have to shoot myself.

At least I know how now, I picked up using a gun pretty quick? It just was lying there anyway, and they were talking about how I should be able to at least try to defend myself... the kid jumped pretty bad when he noticed I had it, though. Least I've gotten one laugh.

Damnit, something fell out there and I torn the page. Peeked out the window, I think it was just another piece of rubble coming loose. Everything's grey right now, everywhere, and I got the damndest look when I wondered would it be better when the sun came up. I didn't ask, I don't really need to hear something about the sun never coming out on top of the rest of this shit. Air is so heavy around here, I'd probably believe it.

Can't stop cussing either, I've mostly stopped talking because they didn't stop staring. Well, they still haven't stopped staring, but it's not so much offended stares now. Don't know why I care, since I'm pretty damn sure they don't understand half of what I'm saying anyway. I guess I don't want anyone deciding it would be just as easy to ditch me, and I never thought that would be my concern here, but i'm scared and tired and it's been yea hours since my last cup of coffee.

Hours.

I could cry. ...I could shoot something too, and that would make me feel a lot better. Excpet I'm pretty sure they'd take the damn gun if I did that. My hands shaking is not all the coffee. I'm pretty I remember guns being useless not working on those things, but at least I have something. They insisted I have something anyway, and it's not like I know how to use any kind of a weapon. Except the gun.

I have a gun, and no. Fucking. Coffee. They've got to be out of thier minds.

I've got to be out of my mind. I don't know how I got here, I haven't even tried to figure out how I got here. How I'm gonna get home. Supposed to be sleeping right now and not scribbling away in a notebook I grabbed during a grocery raid. But I can't seem to stop thinking and for some wierd reason?

Like maybe I'm losing it already?

The most urgent question in my mind feels like - since when the hell does Ryo smoke?!!