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Aug. 18th, 2006 08:38 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
spoke1489 words, all total.
Even if it is in two separate points in time. I am the blah, I need to have fun to get any energy. And, having had fun while writing, I moved on to finishing fun that has nothing whatsoever to do with anything productive! :D
Previously, on Yu-Gi-Oh! ;p
And now! Wherein I have entirely too much fun mocking Bakura. And Malik.
Bakura, having interrupted Malik's plans to molest Jounouchi, proceeds to challenge him to a smirking and sneering contest!
Malik agrees to this contest! (In a put out fashion that says he's much more interested in molesting Jounouchi.) And says they should go somewhere private. Sincethey're obviously going to have sex it's about the Millennium Items.
(I don't know why I am so fascinated with these two. Really, I tend to like couples who could actually be couples, whereas Bakura and Malik would eventually kill each other in any scenario - they both tend to being puppet masters, and as soon as they started in on pulling each other's strings? Someone would die.
And yet. *purr* )
Once at a somewhat isolated pier!
Bakura: Give your Millennium Item to me nice and quiet, andI won't dump your body into the bay when we're done I'll let you live...
Malik: So you're collecting them? But why?Aside from the fact that the way you're staring at me makes it abundantly clear that you have a thing about gold.
Bakura: Power, of course. In a hidden temple in Egypt in the Tablet of the Pharaoh's Memories. When the seven Millennium Items are placed within it, the door of darkness will open... ...and the one who opened it will gain the evil power that was sealed in the void long ago. H-heh heh heh...
Malik: *thinking* How does he know about the stone tablet?! It's a secret of the Tomb Guardians... *aloud* Keh-heh. I see... but it takes more than the Millennium Items to open the door of darkness... It seems you don't know the whole truth...
*insert pause for Bakura to think 'What?!' and Malik to think about the carvings on his back*
Malik: Do you know Yugi, the owner of the Millennium Puzzle? You must be planning to get rid of him eventually... right?
Bakura: Maybe...
Malik: Hmm. So who are you?
Bakura: You can call me... Bakura.
Malik: Listen, Bakura... I don't care about the Millennium Items. All I want is... Yugi's life.
Bakura: (solid-eyed, intrigued evil smirk) Really...
Malik: If I can bury him here at Battle City... The Millennium Rod will mean nothing more to me than a hunk of metal. But I still have use for it now... How about this... If you agree to help me... Then, when it's all over, I'll be glad to give you the Rod.
Bakura: And if I refuse...?
Malik: You won't leave this pier alive.
Bakura: *contempt* Hmph. *thinking* Does he really know something about the tablet that I don't?
Malik: I'll give you five minutes... Yes or no... It's your choice.
Bakura: ... (with that beautiful sulky expression that I wish I could scan! Why are all the best expressions next to the spines of the books?! :( )
Bakura: (clearly watching Malik) *thinking* Do I make him my enemy... or not?
Malik: (clearly looking at the Rod!) *thinking* No matter how he answers... I can still use him...! Keh keh keh...!
Five. Freaking. Minutes. Of standing there planning to manipulate each other. Squeee! >:D
Meanwhile, inside Domino's aquarium - Ryota (Mako Tsunami) is drowning Jounouchi! Go Ryota!! :D
Even if it does turn out that he lost his Dad in a fishing accident. Only it doesn't go - 'So we were out fishing one day when the sea got angry at some guys in the boat next to us and happened to get my Dad'
It goes - Dad was always the best, and always looking for challenges. But one day he never came back, and then I found the wreckage of the ship he'd been using... :( ...but I refuse to believe he's dead! And my denial will take the form of participating in card tournaments until I have the money to buy a boat and go looking for him!
Meantime I'll just cling to this card that looks like him, even if it costs me duels. :/
*insert screaming fit because dammit must everyone have a freaking tragic past?! &$%#$%&*
Well, actually, the equating of Ryota's desire to battle the sea with Jou's desire to battle Yugi is kind of neat.
And just as Ryota summons Fortress Whale - cut!!
Back to the psychos at the pier. :D
Malik: All right... Five minutes is up. Now you either die... or join forces with me. What's your choice?
Bakura: *thinking* Malik, eh... This man holds the key to the door of darkness... *aloud* If you want to hurt Yugi... The best way is to go through his friends. I've just been waiting for the right moment, myself...
Malik: I know. I already plan to use them. That's why I've got this Millennium Rod.
Bakura: Their bond is strong. They'll know instantly that you're up to no good.They've become paranoid due to the sheer amount of people trying to kill them lately. They'll take one look at you and run off straight to Yugi screaming about Egyptian lunatics being after them. But I have a convenient hiding place: my host. Maybe that could prove... useful. This is a perfect opportunity to punish Ryou for not putting out.
Malik: "Host" eh? And how will you do that?
Bakura: My answer is... This...
And the expression, and it looks like a blush, and omg my brain is broken. You can just imagine Ryou in the background yelling at him and demanding to know where he thinks he's going to put that. XD
Meanwhile I had wondered where he got the knife, and thought maybe he stole it - and then it occurred to me it could just as easily be something of Ryou's, for use in making Monster World dolls etc. >.> What other interesting things might Ryou have lying about the house that Bakura could usein sexual kinks for nefarious purposes?! >:)
Um. Story-telling. #^^#
Jounouchi vs. Ryota, see important points above.
Jou: Fortress Whale. o.o
Mako: >:D
Pages and pages of Jou vs. Ryota. Which ends with Ryota bringing back Legendary Fisherman instead of Fortress Whale, and Jou accusing him of throwing the match. >:P
The Rare Hunters on watch inform Master Malik that Jou's duel is over. So do we grab him now, or what?
Malik: *thinking to the Hunter* No... Don't touch him... There's been a change in plans... we have an ally...
I. Just. That is so beautifully wrong. XD
And! Jounouchi leaves the aquarium, Anzu and Sugoroku in tow. They've reminded him that he just qualified for the finals, and he's about to find out where those are, when they notice Bakura limping along in Malik's arms.
Malik claims to have found him lying in the street!
Bakura claims not to have a clue what's going on!
And Anzu is the only one who seems properly concerned about the fact that's he cut! Jounouchi would much rather know who did that for the purpose of beating them up. >:P Once a punk, always a punk.
No, really. Because the guy whose duel disk Bakura stole earlier? Shows up, with a friend.
Bakura? Still knows nothing. With a hidden ! not now! >.>
Malik actually improvises well, taking a hit one of the guys meant for Bakura, and causing Jou to jump to the rescue.
With the words 'Hey! Guy whose name I don't know! :O'
Anzu checks if 'guy whose name I don't know' is okay while Jounouchi proceeds to beat the crap out of the guy who only wanted his duel disk back. Because you know, heroes defend theft. :P So after he leaves them in a cringing heap, he comes over and apologizes that it took so long (XD) and Sugoroku volunteers to take Bakura to the hospital.
Malik cleverly introduces himself: Hi. :) I'm Namu! I'm sweet and kind hearted, as evidenced by myviolent molestation of helping your friend. And I'm not a very good duelist, so please don't hurt me? O:)
Jou and Anzu: Aww, lookit the cute!
Malik: *thinking* Must not laugh manically, must not laugh manically. :x
Rare Hunter: *mentally* HELP! Master Malik, help help help!! Yugi and Kaiba have teamed up and they both have god cards and they're kicking our butts all over the place! We can't stop them, help. x.x;;
Malik: x.x *annoyed patience with incompetent help* Don't worry. I've arranged for assassins... Assassins with decks to defeat god!
And so he alerts the Annoying Mask Duelists, who go forth to find Kaiba and Yugi. :P Meanwhile he shall occupy himself by making Yugi's friends into his pawns, bwahaha!!
'Namu': You guys are so quiet! You're not even paying attention to me! :o
Jou: We're worried about our friend. :/
*insert seething about not worrying about Bakura until it's too late, &$#!@$ morons.*
'Namu': But he'll be okay at the hospital, right? O:) So, you can pay attention to meand become my brainless pawn! Not that you have a brain now. and teach me things about dueling, right? *hooded eyes gloating look when they turn away again*
Cut toBatman and Robin! Seto and the Pharaoh!
Pharaoh: *worries seethingly over not finding Jou*
Seto: Don't worry so much, Yugi. We'll know where to go soon enough. Meh heh heh... Aren't we an odd pair... Here I am, walking shoulder to shoulder with the man I swore would always be my lifelong rival... (new panel, flame outline) And all the time I want nothing more than to beat you right here and now!
Pharaoh: *you know he's using the gritted teeth of impatience tone* Kaiba... Right now, I just want to make sure my friends are safe!
Seto: *would rather the Pharaoh had no friends, since it distracts him from importantsex gaming* I don't care at all about your friends! But.. we both share one purpose... (inward, ticked off look) The ghouls... Rare card hunters who step on the hearts of those who love collectible card games... I'm going to smash their organization, and then I'm going to smash every single one of them, individually!
Yugi... I joined forces with you becauseyou make good bait you attract lunatics like flies I'm paranoid someone will beat and/or kill you while I'm not looking together, we make an irresistible prize. To the above mentioned lunatics We'll attract the god-hunting ghouls... and kill them! We've already got rid of a few of these scum.
(I'm not sure he's being entirely metaphorical on the killing bit. He certainly makes good on it later.)
(Also - I may hate the subtext between these two, because hello power imbalance! But it is so there.)
Pharaoh: *suspicious!* Kaiba... How did you get a god card?
Seto: *smirky joy of secrets!* Hmph... The god card chose me, that's all... And not just one... All three of them! They will choose me! Out of every person in the world!
And, you know, he has that lovely 'world domination!' smile on his face, the one where he almost looks too happy to have Evil Intentions, but he so does? And the Pharaoh doesn't even get a chance to respond to that, because Mokuba pages Seto via their nifty Trek-type communicators! He's at the aquarium, duh.
Seto: *thinking* an aquarium, eh? Talk a small fish in a big pond... out loud Well, Yugi... We've located your friend. I'll expect some thanks!
The Pharaoh has that happy!:D smile which Seto immediately stomps on by dissing Jounouchi, and they stomp off arguing about his merits as a duelist, like so:
Pharaoh: He's a good duelist!
Seto: He's a crybaby. Remember me making him cry? >:)
Pharaoh: x.x But he's gotten better!
Seto: He sucks.
Pharaoh: Kai-ba! >:/
Seto: He sucks and I'm kicking him out of my tournament when we find him. So there. *smirk*
Pharaoh: *death glare, not moving*
Seto: *realizes he's lostRobin his spare bait the Pharaoh* ...What? *smirkity*
Pharaoh: *probably thinking that if he had his nifty Pharaoh-memories, he'd know some way to smite Seto where he stands* Fine. *stomps along with Seto*
And then.. the most horrible thing. It, this. XD
So the smaller Mask-Duelist has a 'Duelist's Chastity Belt'. That is seriously what he calls it. And as if that wasn't bad enough, he attacks Seto with it - it's... actually a pretty accurate name, given that it kind of locks up the Duel Disk. But, but.
Chastity Belt. Seto. XD XD XD *stifles the urge to give Mokuba one so that he can prevent Pharaoh taking undue advantage of his brother* XD
Ahem.
Seto: *flames of must!have!blood!!* You scum! You'd better laugh while you can... No one touches my Duel Disk and lives!
Light Mask: (effectively) Nyah-nyah, I have the ke~ey! You have to chase me to ~get it!~ *looks at Pharaoh* Oh, and you? You, we'll kill your friend if you don't come with. ciao!
Cue Dramatic Ascent to the Top of Skyscraper! On top of Skyscraper with Curiously Unsafe Glass Roof Design:
Dark Mask: Oookay, given the look in your eyes, I'm going to drop the key in the middle of the roof, rather than handing it to you and giving you the chance to break my neck. >.>
Seto: disappointedly *expressionlessly takes key*
And I love how, every time the manga has someone dying or suffering crippling injuries, the anime replaced it with 'Shadow Realm'. >:P
The real setup - they're standing on the 13th floor of a building (just for the number 13 ;p) on a skylight that descends through the entire building. ...I can actually understand the point of making something like that? It lets real sunlight into your entire building, which is probably good for the employees of whomever owns it.
Sadly, it also makes for a handy deathtrap. :P What with them standing on the glass itself, and bombs attached to each pane of glass that are set up as auxiliary life-counters. When the points hit zero, *boom* and you go plummeting to your death.
...okay, how long was Malik supposed to be scouting out Domino, to find a place like that and set up that scenario? :P And how many nifty death-traps did they not conveniently wander into? Because I'm picturing really, really bored ghouls hanging around the city, here. :PPP
What follows is a duel equally impressive in the slow development of actual pseudo-teamwork on the parts of Kaiba and the Pharaoh, and annoying in the existence of the opposing team.
...why did they never get to team up against anyone interesting? Seriously! Malik and Rishid would have been nice. Malik and Bakura! ...Freaking possessed Anzu and Jounouchi, anybody but these two!! :PPP
Really, it's not amazing that Seto and the Pharaoh manage to tag-team them. It's amazing no one has broken their clearly fragile team up before this.
...okay, actually it is amazing that Seto and the Pharaoh can work together at all. Seriously, first cards drawn and the Pharaoh is wondering whether they can work together without preparation or planning.
Seto is planning to use Yugi as a means to assure his own victory. :P
I would submit that being dropped into it cold turkey is the only way they could work together. Enough time to think about it beforehand and, well. Power. Imbalance. They both know it. They both know they both know it. And the Pharaoh is not quite a big enough fool to miss the fact that Seto resents it, either. I think the comfort level of knowing Seto had no time to Elaborately and Diabolically Plan is what lets him turn his back (metaphorically) at a crucial point during the duel. >:P
So: Masks have blocked sacrifice-summons. Sadly? This is the basis of both Pharaoh and Seto's strategies - they have no back-up plans. (I cannot help but thinking that this would be a useless tactic against, oh... everyone else! Really it is a pointless bit of ranting, because the whole point of the Masks is to stop the god cards - but it's still funny.)
They actually make eye contact in the moment of realizing they're screwed. XD Pharaoh basically acknowledging to himself that they are screwed, but this just means they must work together!
Seto giving him the flat-eyed glare of 'go screw yourself.' Although the word connected with this glare is 'Absurd!'
Duel moving forward to the point where the Pharaoh activates his &^%$# Kuriboh/Multiply combo, and Seto's face. XD The priceless utter shock of being on the protected side of that combo. *dies*
And while Seto's recovering from the shock of Yugi protecting him, the Pharaoh has to go and tactlessly mention that Kaiba knows this combo. >:P Which has the lovely and immediate effect of both snapping Seto out of it and ticking him off.
Seto: I don't need you protecting me! Not even from certain death! >:o
Pharaoh: -.-;; Look. See those two? Know why they're going to hand us our asses? Teamwork. Know what we need to hand them theirs, instead? Teamwork. And stop being a whiner. >:/
Seto: I am not whining! And are you trying to tell me one person can't win this alone?! >:o
Pharaoh: *chokes back a Kai-ba!* Yes. That would be the point.
*mutual seething!!*
*more Mask cards of Annoyance, including the death of Multiply!*
...okay, Kuriboh is cute. Especially when it says 'Eeep!' and 'Kuri...' just like it were a little Pokemon.. :)
Then - finally! They begin using that uber-creepy, shippy thing they have of reading each others' minds (and dressing to compete, but that has no relevance in this duel) to actually attempt teamwork.
Pharaoh: Okay, my hand sucks. ..I could use this nifty card to make us both dump our hands, but... if Seto has something good he'll never ever forgive me. And I need him to pretend to like me until this duel is over, at least. *seethe/fret/annoyed*
Seto: *eye rolling smugness* Hmmm. I guess if all your cards suck, you're defenseless huh? if you don't have anything useful, I guess all your cards should go to the graveyard.
Pharaoh: O.o whaaa - :O I get it, he wants to -
Interlude of Masks of Annoyance! And one high level monster with 3200 attack points, from which Seto saves the Pharaoh by using his monster for a shield.
Seto: Now we're even.
And then. Card Destruction. And Monster Reborn to get around their sacrifice summons block.
Blue. Eyes. White. Dragon. >:D
Seto: Sometimes the graveyard is just a stop on the way to the battlefield!
Sadly, it doesn't stay that cool. Since Seto immediately tells Yugi that he understands how this tag team thing works now - it's how well you use your partner. And Yugi's a fool for thinking this makes them friends or something. Oh, and now that he has Blue Eyes, he doesn't need Yugi anymore, mock mockity gloat! >:D
The Pharaoh, who obviously was having some sort of cloud 9, 'We're a team, wheee!' moment - crashes abruptly and is left with no recourse but to glare at Seto. XD
Then another sad moment of reality: 3200 Masked Beast vs 3000 Blue Eyes = dead dragon. Seto is foiled! :/
Pharaoh: Attack!
Seto: What?! o.o;
Pharaoh: *smug* Who's the fool now, Kaiba? Either trust me to have your back with a card that will let Blue Eyes beat that thing, or lose. HA!
I hate it when the Pharaoh pwns Seto like this. Hate hate hate! *stabs!*
Pharaoh: *interjecting into Seto's moment of deliberation* Show your courage, Kaiba! Heh heh...
Seto: *thinking* Fine! Watch me! I don't care if it's a taunt... I won't back down from you!
Of course, it worked. Because the Pharaoh had sent Archfiend of Gilfer to the graveyard, which = -500 points off the attack of the enemy's monster.
Everyone just stands there, mildly stunned, Seto wondering at the fact that this was also part of the plan and wow look how far ahead he thinks. And how helpfully. O.o
And the Pharaoh gloating at the stun-edness of his audience. >:PP
Pharaoh: Kaiba... This is the power of unity!
Seto has no line in response to that. Just the shocked expression and a large !
More Masks, but this time! This time the Pharaoh has his Mystical Rift Panel, turns their Mask on them, and leaves them snarling at each other while he smiles the nastiest smile I have seen on his face in some time. Creepy even, it is.
Meanwhile, Seto is still in shock - what with the unity comment and Pharaoh saving his Blue Eyes with the Mystical Rift Panel. *sigh*
The End!
Or, To Be Continued! ;p
Which is unavoidable between me being kind of sleepy and the fact that we are now in heavy cliffhanger territory. It keeps stopping in the middle of duels! Really good ones!
Seto & Pharaoh vs Masks finishes in the next one, but that stops in the middle of Yugi w/o Puzzle vs Jou w/Malik in his brain - and it is so much cooler than in the anime. I swear the more I dislike the Pharaoh, the more Yugi just shines. But the thing with the anime is, they stunted Yugi's growth just as much as anybody else's, and it really makes the Pharaoh come off as the main hero - and he isn't. That's Yugi, and he is really coming into his own here. ^_^
And then the finish of Yugi vs Jou leads us into Pharaoh vs Bakura. It. Freaking. Stopped. In the middle of the Bakura duel, before the moment of truth/protecting Ryou incident. >:O And, the one that promises to finish that? Will then undoubtedly leave me hanging in the middle of Jou vs. Rishid.
Have I ever mentioned how much I love the Ishtars just for their screwed up family dynamics? And the Malik/Rishid shipping? Gee, I think I have. :P And I have not begun to squeal about the finally-I-have-been-waiting! arrival of Rishid, and the differences in him. And I get no peace thinking 'I'll know what happens with the Bakurae come September!', because come September, I'll have the Ishtars to replace that! GAH!!
Even if it is in two separate points in time. I am the blah, I need to have fun to get any energy. And, having had fun while writing, I moved on to finishing fun that has nothing whatsoever to do with anything productive! :D
Previously, on Yu-Gi-Oh! ;p
And now! Wherein I have entirely too much fun mocking Bakura. And Malik.
Bakura, having interrupted Malik's plans to molest Jounouchi, proceeds to challenge him to a smirking and sneering contest!
Malik agrees to this contest! (In a put out fashion that says he's much more interested in molesting Jounouchi.) And says they should go somewhere private. Since
(I don't know why I am so fascinated with these two. Really, I tend to like couples who could actually be couples, whereas Bakura and Malik would eventually kill each other in any scenario - they both tend to being puppet masters, and as soon as they started in on pulling each other's strings? Someone would die.
And yet. *purr* )
Once at a somewhat isolated pier!
Bakura: Give your Millennium Item to me nice and quiet, and
Malik: So you're collecting them? But why?
Bakura: Power, of course. In a hidden temple in Egypt in the Tablet of the Pharaoh's Memories. When the seven Millennium Items are placed within it, the door of darkness will open... ...and the one who opened it will gain the evil power that was sealed in the void long ago. H-heh heh heh...
Malik: *thinking* How does he know about the stone tablet?! It's a secret of the Tomb Guardians... *aloud* Keh-heh. I see... but it takes more than the Millennium Items to open the door of darkness... It seems you don't know the whole truth...
*insert pause for Bakura to think 'What?!' and Malik to think about the carvings on his back*
Malik: Do you know Yugi, the owner of the Millennium Puzzle? You must be planning to get rid of him eventually... right?
Bakura: Maybe...
Malik: Hmm. So who are you?
Bakura: You can call me... Bakura.
Malik: Listen, Bakura... I don't care about the Millennium Items. All I want is... Yugi's life.
Bakura: (solid-eyed, intrigued evil smirk) Really...
Malik: If I can bury him here at Battle City... The Millennium Rod will mean nothing more to me than a hunk of metal. But I still have use for it now... How about this... If you agree to help me... Then, when it's all over, I'll be glad to give you the Rod.
Bakura: And if I refuse...?
Malik: You won't leave this pier alive.
Bakura: *contempt* Hmph. *thinking* Does he really know something about the tablet that I don't?
Malik: I'll give you five minutes... Yes or no... It's your choice.
Bakura: ... (with that beautiful sulky expression that I wish I could scan! Why are all the best expressions next to the spines of the books?! :( )
Bakura: (clearly watching Malik) *thinking* Do I make him my enemy... or not?
Malik: (clearly looking at the Rod!) *thinking* No matter how he answers... I can still use him...! Keh keh keh...!
Five. Freaking. Minutes. Of standing there planning to manipulate each other. Squeee! >:D
Meanwhile, inside Domino's aquarium - Ryota (Mako Tsunami) is drowning Jounouchi! Go Ryota!! :D
Even if it does turn out that he lost his Dad in a fishing accident. Only it doesn't go - 'So we were out fishing one day when the sea got angry at some guys in the boat next to us and happened to get my Dad'
It goes - Dad was always the best, and always looking for challenges. But one day he never came back, and then I found the wreckage of the ship he'd been using... :( ...but I refuse to believe he's dead! And my denial will take the form of participating in card tournaments until I have the money to buy a boat and go looking for him!
Meantime I'll just cling to this card that looks like him, even if it costs me duels. :/
*insert screaming fit because dammit must everyone have a freaking tragic past?! &$%#$%&*
Well, actually, the equating of Ryota's desire to battle the sea with Jou's desire to battle Yugi is kind of neat.
And just as Ryota summons Fortress Whale - cut!!
Back to the psychos at the pier. :D
Malik: All right... Five minutes is up. Now you either die... or join forces with me. What's your choice?
Bakura: *thinking* Malik, eh... This man holds the key to the door of darkness... *aloud* If you want to hurt Yugi... The best way is to go through his friends. I've just been waiting for the right moment, myself...
Malik: I know. I already plan to use them. That's why I've got this Millennium Rod.
Bakura: Their bond is strong. They'll know instantly that you're up to no good.
Malik: "Host" eh? And how will you do that?
Bakura: My answer is... This...
And the expression, and it looks like a blush, and omg my brain is broken. You can just imagine Ryou in the background yelling at him and demanding to know where he thinks he's going to put that. XD
Meanwhile I had wondered where he got the knife, and thought maybe he stole it - and then it occurred to me it could just as easily be something of Ryou's, for use in making Monster World dolls etc. >.> What other interesting things might Ryou have lying about the house that Bakura could use
Um. Story-telling. #^^#
Jounouchi vs. Ryota, see important points above.
Jou: Fortress Whale. o.o
Mako: >:D
Pages and pages of Jou vs. Ryota. Which ends with Ryota bringing back Legendary Fisherman instead of Fortress Whale, and Jou accusing him of throwing the match. >:P
The Rare Hunters on watch inform Master Malik that Jou's duel is over. So do we grab him now, or what?
Malik: *thinking to the Hunter* No... Don't touch him... There's been a change in plans... we have an ally...
I. Just. That is so beautifully wrong. XD
And! Jounouchi leaves the aquarium, Anzu and Sugoroku in tow. They've reminded him that he just qualified for the finals, and he's about to find out where those are, when they notice Bakura limping along in Malik's arms.
Malik claims to have found him lying in the street!
Bakura claims not to have a clue what's going on!
And Anzu is the only one who seems properly concerned about the fact that's he cut! Jounouchi would much rather know who did that for the purpose of beating them up. >:P Once a punk, always a punk.
No, really. Because the guy whose duel disk Bakura stole earlier? Shows up, with a friend.
Bakura? Still knows nothing. With a hidden ! not now! >.>
Malik actually improvises well, taking a hit one of the guys meant for Bakura, and causing Jou to jump to the rescue.
With the words 'Hey! Guy whose name I don't know! :O'
Anzu checks if 'guy whose name I don't know' is okay while Jounouchi proceeds to beat the crap out of the guy who only wanted his duel disk back. Because you know, heroes defend theft. :P So after he leaves them in a cringing heap, he comes over and apologizes that it took so long (XD) and Sugoroku volunteers to take Bakura to the hospital.
Malik cleverly introduces himself: Hi. :) I'm Namu! I'm sweet and kind hearted, as evidenced by my
Jou and Anzu: Aww, lookit the cute!
Malik: *thinking* Must not laugh manically, must not laugh manically. :x
Rare Hunter: *mentally* HELP! Master Malik, help help help!! Yugi and Kaiba have teamed up and they both have god cards and they're kicking our butts all over the place! We can't stop them, help. x.x;;
Malik: x.x *annoyed patience with incompetent help* Don't worry. I've arranged for assassins... Assassins with decks to defeat god!
And so he alerts the Annoying Mask Duelists, who go forth to find Kaiba and Yugi. :P Meanwhile he shall occupy himself by making Yugi's friends into his pawns, bwahaha!!
'Namu': You guys are so quiet! You're not even paying attention to me! :o
Jou: We're worried about our friend. :/
*insert seething about not worrying about Bakura until it's too late, &$#!@$ morons.*
'Namu': But he'll be okay at the hospital, right? O:) So, you can pay attention to me
Cut to
Pharaoh: *worries seethingly over not finding Jou*
Seto: Don't worry so much, Yugi. We'll know where to go soon enough. Meh heh heh... Aren't we an odd pair... Here I am, walking shoulder to shoulder with the man I swore would always be my lifelong rival... (new panel, flame outline) And all the time I want nothing more than to beat you right here and now!
Pharaoh: *you know he's using the gritted teeth of impatience tone* Kaiba... Right now, I just want to make sure my friends are safe!
Seto: *would rather the Pharaoh had no friends, since it distracts him from important
Yugi... I joined forces with you because
(I'm not sure he's being entirely metaphorical on the killing bit. He certainly makes good on it later.)
(Also - I may hate the subtext between these two, because hello power imbalance! But it is so there.)
Pharaoh: *suspicious!* Kaiba... How did you get a god card?
Seto: *smirky joy of secrets!* Hmph... The god card chose me, that's all... And not just one... All three of them! They will choose me! Out of every person in the world!
And, you know, he has that lovely 'world domination!' smile on his face, the one where he almost looks too happy to have Evil Intentions, but he so does? And the Pharaoh doesn't even get a chance to respond to that, because Mokuba pages Seto via their nifty Trek-type communicators! He's at the aquarium, duh.
Seto: *thinking* an aquarium, eh? Talk a small fish in a big pond... out loud Well, Yugi... We've located your friend. I'll expect some thanks!
The Pharaoh has that happy!:D smile which Seto immediately stomps on by dissing Jounouchi, and they stomp off arguing about his merits as a duelist, like so:
Pharaoh: He's a good duelist!
Seto: He's a crybaby. Remember me making him cry? >:)
Pharaoh: x.x But he's gotten better!
Seto: He sucks.
Pharaoh: Kai-ba! >:/
Seto: He sucks and I'm kicking him out of my tournament when we find him. So there. *smirk*
Pharaoh: *death glare, not moving*
Seto: *realizes he's lost
Pharaoh: *probably thinking that if he had his nifty Pharaoh-memories, he'd know some way to smite Seto where he stands* Fine. *stomps along with Seto*
And then.. the most horrible thing. It, this. XD
So the smaller Mask-Duelist has a 'Duelist's Chastity Belt'. That is seriously what he calls it. And as if that wasn't bad enough, he attacks Seto with it - it's... actually a pretty accurate name, given that it kind of locks up the Duel Disk. But, but.
Chastity Belt. Seto. XD XD XD *stifles the urge to give Mokuba one so that he can prevent Pharaoh taking undue advantage of his brother* XD
Ahem.
Seto: *flames of must!have!blood!!* You scum! You'd better laugh while you can... No one touches my Duel Disk and lives!
Light Mask: (effectively) Nyah-nyah, I have the ke~ey! You have to chase me to ~get it!~ *looks at Pharaoh* Oh, and you? You, we'll kill your friend if you don't come with. ciao!
Cue Dramatic Ascent to the Top of Skyscraper! On top of Skyscraper with Curiously Unsafe Glass Roof Design:
Dark Mask: Oookay, given the look in your eyes, I'm going to drop the key in the middle of the roof, rather than handing it to you and giving you the chance to break my neck. >.>
Seto: disappointedly *expressionlessly takes key*
And I love how, every time the manga has someone dying or suffering crippling injuries, the anime replaced it with 'Shadow Realm'. >:P
The real setup - they're standing on the 13th floor of a building (just for the number 13 ;p) on a skylight that descends through the entire building. ...I can actually understand the point of making something like that? It lets real sunlight into your entire building, which is probably good for the employees of whomever owns it.
Sadly, it also makes for a handy deathtrap. :P What with them standing on the glass itself, and bombs attached to each pane of glass that are set up as auxiliary life-counters. When the points hit zero, *boom* and you go plummeting to your death.
...okay, how long was Malik supposed to be scouting out Domino, to find a place like that and set up that scenario? :P And how many nifty death-traps did they not conveniently wander into? Because I'm picturing really, really bored ghouls hanging around the city, here. :PPP
What follows is a duel equally impressive in the slow development of actual pseudo-teamwork on the parts of Kaiba and the Pharaoh, and annoying in the existence of the opposing team.
...why did they never get to team up against anyone interesting? Seriously! Malik and Rishid would have been nice. Malik and Bakura! ...Freaking possessed Anzu and Jounouchi, anybody but these two!! :PPP
Really, it's not amazing that Seto and the Pharaoh manage to tag-team them. It's amazing no one has broken their clearly fragile team up before this.
...okay, actually it is amazing that Seto and the Pharaoh can work together at all. Seriously, first cards drawn and the Pharaoh is wondering whether they can work together without preparation or planning.
Seto is planning to use Yugi as a means to assure his own victory. :P
I would submit that being dropped into it cold turkey is the only way they could work together. Enough time to think about it beforehand and, well. Power. Imbalance. They both know it. They both know they both know it. And the Pharaoh is not quite a big enough fool to miss the fact that Seto resents it, either. I think the comfort level of knowing Seto had no time to Elaborately and Diabolically Plan is what lets him turn his back (metaphorically) at a crucial point during the duel. >:P
So: Masks have blocked sacrifice-summons. Sadly? This is the basis of both Pharaoh and Seto's strategies - they have no back-up plans. (I cannot help but thinking that this would be a useless tactic against, oh... everyone else! Really it is a pointless bit of ranting, because the whole point of the Masks is to stop the god cards - but it's still funny.)
They actually make eye contact in the moment of realizing they're screwed. XD Pharaoh basically acknowledging to himself that they are screwed, but this just means they must work together!
Seto giving him the flat-eyed glare of 'go screw yourself.' Although the word connected with this glare is 'Absurd!'
Duel moving forward to the point where the Pharaoh activates his &^%$# Kuriboh/Multiply combo, and Seto's face. XD The priceless utter shock of being on the protected side of that combo. *dies*
And while Seto's recovering from the shock of Yugi protecting him, the Pharaoh has to go and tactlessly mention that Kaiba knows this combo. >:P Which has the lovely and immediate effect of both snapping Seto out of it and ticking him off.
Seto: I don't need you protecting me! Not even from certain death! >:o
Pharaoh: -.-;; Look. See those two? Know why they're going to hand us our asses? Teamwork. Know what we need to hand them theirs, instead? Teamwork. And stop being a whiner. >:/
Seto: I am not whining! And are you trying to tell me one person can't win this alone?! >:o
Pharaoh: *chokes back a Kai-ba!* Yes. That would be the point.
*mutual seething!!*
*more Mask cards of Annoyance, including the death of Multiply!*
...okay, Kuriboh is cute. Especially when it says 'Eeep!' and 'Kuri...' just like it were a little Pokemon.. :)
Then - finally! They begin using that uber-creepy, shippy thing they have of reading each others' minds (and dressing to compete, but that has no relevance in this duel) to actually attempt teamwork.
Pharaoh: Okay, my hand sucks. ..I could use this nifty card to make us both dump our hands, but... if Seto has something good he'll never ever forgive me. And I need him to pretend to like me until this duel is over, at least. *seethe/fret/annoyed*
Seto: *eye rolling smugness* Hmmm. I guess if all your cards suck, you're defenseless huh? if you don't have anything useful, I guess all your cards should go to the graveyard.
Pharaoh: O.o whaaa - :O I get it, he wants to -
Interlude of Masks of Annoyance! And one high level monster with 3200 attack points, from which Seto saves the Pharaoh by using his monster for a shield.
Seto: Now we're even.
And then. Card Destruction. And Monster Reborn to get around their sacrifice summons block.
Blue. Eyes. White. Dragon. >:D
Seto: Sometimes the graveyard is just a stop on the way to the battlefield!
Sadly, it doesn't stay that cool. Since Seto immediately tells Yugi that he understands how this tag team thing works now - it's how well you use your partner. And Yugi's a fool for thinking this makes them friends or something. Oh, and now that he has Blue Eyes, he doesn't need Yugi anymore, mock mockity gloat! >:D
The Pharaoh, who obviously was having some sort of cloud 9, 'We're a team, wheee!' moment - crashes abruptly and is left with no recourse but to glare at Seto. XD
Then another sad moment of reality: 3200 Masked Beast vs 3000 Blue Eyes = dead dragon. Seto is foiled! :/
Pharaoh: Attack!
Seto: What?! o.o;
Pharaoh: *smug* Who's the fool now, Kaiba? Either trust me to have your back with a card that will let Blue Eyes beat that thing, or lose. HA!
I hate it when the Pharaoh pwns Seto like this. Hate hate hate! *stabs!*
Pharaoh: *interjecting into Seto's moment of deliberation* Show your courage, Kaiba! Heh heh...
Seto: *thinking* Fine! Watch me! I don't care if it's a taunt... I won't back down from you!
Of course, it worked. Because the Pharaoh had sent Archfiend of Gilfer to the graveyard, which = -500 points off the attack of the enemy's monster.
Everyone just stands there, mildly stunned, Seto wondering at the fact that this was also part of the plan and wow look how far ahead he thinks. And how helpfully. O.o
And the Pharaoh gloating at the stun-edness of his audience. >:PP
Pharaoh: Kaiba... This is the power of unity!
Seto has no line in response to that. Just the shocked expression and a large !
More Masks, but this time! This time the Pharaoh has his Mystical Rift Panel, turns their Mask on them, and leaves them snarling at each other while he smiles the nastiest smile I have seen on his face in some time. Creepy even, it is.
Meanwhile, Seto is still in shock - what with the unity comment and Pharaoh saving his Blue Eyes with the Mystical Rift Panel. *sigh*
The End!
Or, To Be Continued! ;p
Which is unavoidable between me being kind of sleepy and the fact that we are now in heavy cliffhanger territory. It keeps stopping in the middle of duels! Really good ones!
Seto & Pharaoh vs Masks finishes in the next one, but that stops in the middle of Yugi w/o Puzzle vs Jou w/Malik in his brain - and it is so much cooler than in the anime. I swear the more I dislike the Pharaoh, the more Yugi just shines. But the thing with the anime is, they stunted Yugi's growth just as much as anybody else's, and it really makes the Pharaoh come off as the main hero - and he isn't. That's Yugi, and he is really coming into his own here. ^_^
And then the finish of Yugi vs Jou leads us into Pharaoh vs Bakura. It. Freaking. Stopped. In the middle of the Bakura duel, before the moment of truth/protecting Ryou incident. >:O And, the one that promises to finish that? Will then undoubtedly leave me hanging in the middle of Jou vs. Rishid.
Have I ever mentioned how much I love the Ishtars just for their screwed up family dynamics? And the Malik/Rishid shipping? Gee, I think I have. :P And I have not begun to squeal about the finally-I-have-been-waiting! arrival of Rishid, and the differences in him. And I get no peace thinking 'I'll know what happens with the Bakurae come September!', because come September, I'll have the Ishtars to replace that! GAH!!
