Don't you love girly-tmi posts! ;p

[spoke]

Waking up yesterday to the realization that I am having a Voice of Irrational Doom-type of period. Oh yes, everything related to me sucks regardless of what I tell myself. But at least now I can't convince myself these thoughts are rational, thus becoming more depressed.

If I could take some drug that would knock me out for like, a week and/or until this is over, I would.

Meanwhile, I keep trying to keep myself distracted when the sudden pits of ;_; open under me. Latest one was thinking I hadn't done anything this weekend. *hugs Shusu!* Because I did, dammit, I was beta-ing! I like being helpful!

There was shopping of books, and coffee with the books - I have a lovely samurai book by Stephen Turnbull, with overlaying vellum pages showing a samurai, and everything that goes under the armor! And lots of other interesting pictures, and sure Turnbull tends to repeat himself, but that just means this should have everything I might need from that source. :P Also, vellum = *.*

And laundry and some writing though I need to put in serious work there, and I've finally ordered rear-view mirror replacements for my car (don'taskhowlongi'vebeendrivingwithoutthose) and I'm waiting for confirmation that my order has been accepted (they'd better take my money, darnit!) and my sister's birthday present arrived and I'm right now going through the making of recovery discs for the computer in case anything catastropic should happen to it. >.>

All of which feels like tiny sparks underneath the weight of woe. At most I've managed to lose myself in some reading, and occasionally lighten the mood to a resentful, 'well I still suck' sort of emotion.

Okay. Showering. Final round of eye drops for the day. Then maybe gaming while I wait for these 11 CDs it's supposed to need to write. At least Dad will be happy, he keeps asking about those every-so-often.

Comments

[shusu.livejournal.com]

You gave good beta ^^