blinks and hides her face

my head hurts. never never invite a Snape muse of any variety to help straighten out timelines.

unless, of course, he's wildy out of character and has thus lost the control freak/ ordering everything around him as precisly as his dungeons aspect.

because, you see, you may find out something that you'd rather not have dealt with.

i thought i had most of the stuff i've already typed up pretty well organised. i thought i knew where everything/one was.

and then i'm trying to work out what Snape's doing in Hourglass; and he suddenly informs me that i have way too short of a timeline, and X, Y and Z are also part of the same universe.

i say this is impossible, as they are fantasy and this is (supposed to be) science fiction

according to Snape, i have overlooked the fundamental facts of how magic works here: it functions like a tide, going in and coming out, sometimes leaving pockets like little pools of seawater after a high tide:what i thought was just science fiction is actually low tide, with the most important technology getting some of its power from the residule magic.

and then stands there waiting for me to get on with it.

ow ow ow ow! my head! (whimpers, whines, doesn't WANT to do this much work on internal consistency, WANTS to be a lazybutt)

but it explains why certain things had a feel to them that matched with what i'd been working on. i'm doomed. waaaah!

(no subject)

had... calling it a breakdown feels pretenious, but i was crying last night, and i hardly ever do that. snifle, and whine, yes. actually cry? nuh-uh.

thinking about everything, but most especially needing to learn to drive, and then get a job... and went from there to i can't do anything right, i suck at everything.

i don't know. maybe i'm just moody. maybe if i get somethings finished, like Lark for Tenshi, i'll feel better.

towards which end, i have bleached the paper i'm going to use for Lark. this thing is turning into something rather different than what i set out to do. but then, i have really tried to draw since highschool, until i made my silly little icons for my lj, and i never was good/interested in drawing people. (these two facts may be related, but i don't see how. noo.)

i just keep worrying if its good enough, and will she like, or will she be offended b my awful drawing... (some part of me is saying this is silly and irrational, but i can't /feel/ that way, only think it.)

just... damn it, i'm going to get this thing finished, or at least halfway, today. i am not going to have my sister move out, taking her computer with her, and be stuck in infinite limbo over this.